Hello boys and gurrrls, guest contributor, Feline, here to talk with ya a bit about jeans shorts. I bet you’re sitting in the nook of your favorite cafe, drinking Diet Sprite from the can through a flexie straw wondering, “Who the heck is Feline, and what in blazes does he know about cut off denim shorts?” He knows it all, baby. Feline knows about the pert curvature of your under butt playin’ peek-a-boo through your dangling fringe, honey. Feline can tell ya all the secrets ya keepin in that tiny fifth pocket that’s only big enough to hold one more confession before you commit another sin. Feline knows you like the whiff of two day worn denim dyed cotton and the smell of yesterdays news. Feline knows you do, cause Feline likes it too and Feline likes you.
Tonight I’m talking to comedian, director, and improv extraordinaire, Michael Furr. He’s got a special on Amazon Prime called, “Straight Acting” that you need to watch. He also runs theatrical improv plays at Fells Point Corner Theater.
So, you do comedy; have you opened for any bands, yet?
I have! I’ve hosted a few music shows and fundraisers with bands, that sort of thing.
Did any of them mention my band, Pink Lipstick?
I don’t think so . . . but maybe they were just busy. Or distracted.
Yeah, It’s cool. I get it. Busy. We’re busy a lot, too. I just though since we have, like, a pretty big following, that they would’ve mentioned us. But, we’re mostly popular in big cities. You were in New York City recently, right?
I was. I competed in a contest and I did some writing for a trivia app.
OOH, what kinda writing; pop culture and cool happenings?
Yes. It was all very topical and trendy. News of the day type stuff.
Well my band, Pink Lipstick, we’re all very trendy. A very news of the day type band, with a history to boot. Did you know we were the first band that was also a street gang?
. . .No, but, I believe you. Wait, Which one were you first? The band or the gang?
It all kinda happened at once. We stole our instruments from an Italian American owned pawn shop and wore tons of glitter and chiffon. We needed to protect ourselves but we also needed to rock and freakin’ roll, ya know?
I know, I know. You’re bad, you’re bad. Why did you have to point out that it was an Italian American pawn shop? Does that make a difference? You know what, we’re getting off track.
They have connections that run very deep in Orange County. They killed our first bassist, Coke Machine, in ’93. .
Yikes! We didn’t write any trivia about all of that. But, it sounds like it would make a very interesting Netflix original series.
Oh, wait, that reminds me. I have a joke for you.
O.K., if you like it you can use it and you don’t have to give me any credit for it, unless the crowd laughs, o.k.?
Marvel founder, Stan Lee’s cause of death has been revealed: turns out he was cancelled by Netflix.
I an a big comic book fan. I might have to use that. I literally cried when I found out he’d died. I couldn’t believe it. It hit me pretty hard.
I saw him on Carson. Do you like Carson? Johnny not Daly.
I do. I remember staying up late to watch him with my dad.
O.K., you’re very easy to talk to, but I have to wrap this up and I guesss, ask you about jorts.
I’m ready. Ask away.
When my dear sweet brother in adult contemporary hard rock, Coke Machine was murdered by a group of Italian American pawn shop owners, he was wearing acid wash jorts. Has there ever been a time in your life, whether literal or metaphorical, where you faced certain death in jorts?
No, but I did get attacked by a dog one time while wearing jorts. I worked at a boarding kennel. The dog’s name was buttons and the jorts were green.
You can catch Michael Furr on the Yaaas Queen comedy fest on December 16th at the Broadway Comedy Club in New York, and his special “Straight Acting” on Amazon Prime Video is available to stream right now.
Pink Lipstick will be opening for Greta Van Fleet performing at the Pier 6 Pavilion . . .’s adjacent pavilion 5 May 21st 2019. 4p.